welcome to the innernet's worst motorcycle periodical

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Righteous Bags

I just picked up these saddlebags today for the FXR . Found them on cl and they are righteous. They will kick ass on the road, and confuse the fashionistas on the chopper scene. Or maybe they are just 'ironic' enough to be cool. Either way, they were handmade and hand-tooled over 20 years ago by a saddle maker and are built to last.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

winter fixes...

with garage season in full swing and my patience thoroughly worn out by fiberglass, the Sporty is now up on the bench for its annual going over. the "to do" list is pretty long and ambitious but i ain't got a job yet so we can call it all "cabin fever preventative maintenance". but tearing into this turd has lost all intrigue over the years and i would much rather ride it as-is rather than improve upon its stupidity. so to ease into it, i'm starting out with the little things. first up was an exhaust mount. the original is somewhere in baltimore and its summer fix replacement might be in north dakota. fuk'em both. this new one should hold for awhile. 

the coil mount had a crack in it and was cramping the oil-cooler's style, besides i had some finely engineered aluminum bits dylan had made that i had immediately vetoed and banished to the scrap bucket. he only wasted 10 working hours on them so it wasn't a huge loss, for me. 

some inventions are still being developed but are still too top secret for a post. needless to say, when introduced they will make use of the term: "carbonfibervaginalrephasingbarbariandickwoodsplitter".

and i am tired of doing my fork seals every other year. these babies exude testosterone and should help keep them clean.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

sometimes i should stop and think about what i am about to do.

my next attempt will include some kind of release agent.
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i really don't know what i was thinking when i filled my air cleaner cover with expanding foam. made me crave muffins though

Sunday, January 23, 2011

and so the story goes...

its not like i have any money to buy groceries let alone have a motor ported but my application for food stamps is in the works so off the turd goes, oil out...

it would seem that my problems were not just a blown lower bearing

the stator's backing plate came loose and the metal thingys started chewing on the round-de-doo

fortunately there were no surprises on the clutch side. all the metal bits were getting along, the clutch plates are mostly smoked and several of the springs went "boing", never to return.

and so the remainder of the bits are off to Ray's for porting, polishing and a wave of his magic wand.

and, as usual, the dog doesn't give a shit.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

The one. The only...

Lowside B-sides

i heard thought the grape-vine that Paul blew his motor, bummer. i hope he gets it all back together with a quickness and on the cheap. he was super coo for putting up with us during this shoot, thanks paul.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

thanks Lowside Syndicate...

So Rich over at Lowside published another article of mine and i really find it flattering. thanks. so over the next couple days i am gonna put up a bunch of the pictures that they didn't use. all of the photos were done by Josh, this kid is killer. i can't find his email right now but i will put it up soon.  

Tuesday, January 11, 2011


my new and top secret meth/fiberglass laboratory. if anyone has any tips on how to do either, please drop an email, i am getting owned by this crap. 

Monday, January 10, 2011

i would be insulted but...

its all true.  i was told today that instead of having a "train of thought", i have more of "a lame-wheeled shopping cart being blown around an empty parking lot". i just wish it weren't so obvious.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

more super high-tech advancements...

shift-linkage: done, just gotta clean it up a little. 
brakes: done. still gotta clean these up too but the rules say i only need on set of brakes.

seat lower: done. the shock is from a '99 GSXR and had it's reserve and adjustments as part of he cast body. with the help of a hack-saw and some brake fittings, it's now a remote bit.   

Friday, January 7, 2011

no shit...

the foam trick is working! who knew? after several days of curing in sub-zero temperatures, the foam hardened up enough to start carving into it. 
 the rules say that the rear section can't cover up any part of the rim, be more than 5" higher than the seat nor can it extend rearward past the tire. okay, done. fortunately there are no rules against sick banana seats!